These last few days have been . . .
Exhilarating — as I have caught a spirit of enthusiasm in friends around me.
Sad — as I have watched relationships that have deteriorated.
Draining — as I have caught myself reflecting on being exhausted. And then hearing others enquire as to how I am doing.
Supportive — as I have embraced people who step up to keep me going.
Puzzling — as I have sincerely realized that the church can’t fix itself, and that people can’t fix themselves, and least of all, that I can’t fix myself.
When you put it all together, I think I’m on the edge of the cusp of the wave of something great. Trouble is, the wave looks awfully big, the cusp looks like a cliff’s edge, and I feel like I’m looking at the “something great” through blurred lenses.
How can something so great be so frightening? The more I understand God, the more I’m learning that God is not safe, but He is good — that I’m not looking for the good life, I’m looking for the God life.
All that said, being excited often carries a bit of being scared at its core.
The retired person who needs to transition to a new home. The youth who is figuring out love. The mother whose child is loosening the apron strings. The probable divorcee whose relational foundations are being rearranged. The father whose career aspiration is not his current job.
And all of this I’ve seen in one week. And more.
And tomorrow I continue in the risk zone! I hit 55. Some call it Freedom 55. A title that relates to being able to retire and do what you want. I’m ready to hit 55, but the more I approach this age the less I want to retire and the more I want to bring freedom to others.
What wisdom do I need to fulfil God’s purpose on my life — to know Jesus Christ, and to make Him known? What does God know that I need to know to fulfil his calling on my life?
What wisdom do you need?