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We were off to a Worker’s Retreat the last few days.  Yesterday I arrived back in the office and swept through a number of things that had arrived on my desk.  Today is a day to complete a sermon and hopefully have some restful time.

Retreats are a great thing.  In some ways, though, they are like holidays.  Returning means jumping abruptly back into the routine.  I also found the retreat was a refreshing time of visiting and activity – paradoxically this requires an output of energy!

In keeping with my theme of the last while, I’ve been gazing on God.  As I see new aspects of what this means, yesterday and today have been an opportunity to wait on whispers from God.  Whispers of contentment, security and love.  Whispers of the future and pictures of the past.  All combined to provide the type of rest that is based in the assurance that God is in control.

I won’t say this is easy. 

To begin with God – to fix my eyes on Jesus – as I walk through a day, takes intention and perseverance.  Easier said than done!  May God grant us all the opportunity today to be sheltered in his care – resting in the assurance that He cares for us!

So, I ran across a sentence that has me thinking.  All about how much God loves us.

He even reins in the intensity of his love so he does not overwhelm us. (PK devotional for Feb. 2)

I’m not sure that God’s love ever diminishes.  Romans 8 tells us that nothing can separate us from his love (for those who are Christians).  At other points in the Old Testament, God declares “war” on those who are not following him, but at the same time is open to work with them if they repent.

I imagine that we can establish the matter that God loves us with a depth we do not understand.  I suppose the idea of that revelation is certainly unknown to us in it’s depth.  We are people who have been accustomed to disappointment from those we love.  We disappoint those we love.  A purity of love and an ability to love beyond disappointment is hard to fathom.

Would I be overwhelmed by that love?  I wonder.

To take  in a whole landscape is difficult.  To pinpoint one aspect is usually where we begin.  That aspect may be highlighted by afternoon light.  That does not mean the larger canvas is not in view.  The problem is that we cannot concentrate on the large picture – we tend to be able to process only a little bit at a time.

In the end, perhaps God does highlight a portion of his love to us at one time.  When Jesus walked this earth, He was all God.  But the disciples only got to know him gradually.  When we gaze on God, there is no part of God that is missing – perhaps just parts that we see more clearly at the time???

I was talking with a friend yesterday.  He pointed out that, based on the “Mickey Mouse” stressor scales that can be found almost anywhere, my life is in the red zone.

Within a two year period of time I have had my first wife pass away, courted and married a second wife, moderated one of the most contentious assemblies of our denomination, work on a transition plan for ministry which has been completely overturned, been asked to consider running for Mayor, watched the generation ahead of me (those I had looked up to for years) rapidly decline and some die, and . . .

These are good size challenges.  William Bennett says in his Book of Virtures:  “Give yourself and even greater challenge than the one you are trying to master and  you will develop the powers necessary to overcome the original difficulty.”  I think my life has certainly had that aspect to it.  Often not intentionally!

But, I’m convinced that there is a greater approach that has kept my sanity and let’s me move ahead.  As I gaze on God, there is a very real sense in which He is bigger than everything that comes my way.  In life, there are times at which the next challenge is beyond my abilities.  Nothing is beyond God’s abilities – he created the whole thing!

Perhaps I could modify Bennett by saying: “Gaze upon God, and the even greater challenge you are trying to master will be put into perspective.”

Can’t say every day I’m able to live in that reality, but I’m finding that it is better than the alternative.

Well, that is one way to look at it.  As we age, we tend to slow down in our vim and vigor.  We still have all sorts of thoughts and ideas.  But we, hopefully, have much that slows us down. 

Slowing down and patience are things that I have been working on.  I have had surgery on my knees and eyes.  Both of these have allowed me to speed up – I can get to what I can see now – without a great amount of effort.

But should I?  Patience is teaching me that a little forethought and time to cogitate is not a bad thing.  Less people get wounded by careless words or anger without thought.  Opportunity for God to speak into the situation is always a welcome thing.

And so, I am willing to look back over what I have learned and begin to think things through.

By the way, this piece of wisdom came to me in a journal entry in March 5, 2001 as I was contemplating on the book of Joel.  Hopefully I’ve learned a bit more since then – hopefully I’m applying what I wrote!!