Yesterday I sat with another mourner. This one is mourning in anticipation. His wife has cancer and the prognosis gives a short time line.
We have much in common. Our wives were/are the custodians of certain areas of expertise. My wife was a cook. His cares for the administration and accounting. Each of us is being thrown into unfamiliar territory, and we trust that the sharks are not circling.
I suppose his biggest question is “why”.
I’d like to say I had a brilliant answer. All I could do was sit silent – for a moment. Then I merely gave a simplistic answer. “God knows.”
I’ve been pondering that response. Truth flows from that statement. But not all the answers. I wish I knew why a few more years were not granted to Jill. I wish I could say that I understand a need to take Jill from this life at this time. I wish I could answer my fellow traveler that I know the reason for his wife’s demise.
God knows. I merely peek into the past and squint into the future.
For me, I have a hope that others do not. I am assured of Jill’s final/present state. She is in a better situation, with Jesus. In many ways that triumphs my questions of why. She left a body of deterioration for a position of perfection – a much more excellent state.
But often the question of why revolves around those left behind. Once again, I anticipate my own future where I will once again be with Jill and Jesus! And in the present I daily turn to Jesus to give me marathon strength and radical gratitude for each day.
God knows and someday I’ll understand. For now, it’s enough that God knows.
The “why’s” seem to last a long time, but one thing has been sure for me. God’s plans and wishes for us are so much better than our own. The “missing” never stops but I love to think of Allan enjoying the music of heaven, and Jill enjoying full health. We will see them again and that is what I look forward to. In the meantime, Ron, keep busy, and just watch how this will give you an even greater sympathy and service opportunities.
Ron, I am so glad you are able to be a Godly influence in their lives. Maybe God has put you into this position for “such a time as this.” I will keep praying.