I suppose as you get older, you begin to realize that other people know people who know the people you want to know. As a director of admissions in a post secondary school, one of my most important sources of information on students was their references. With the reference in hand, I could gain a fair insight into whether this person would be a good student and gain from their experience at the school.
I was first introduced to the thought of courting Cynthia by her sister, Connie. Her husband has been a very good friend of mine for almost 20 years. I had sung at Connie’s father’s funeral. I had even been to Christmas meals with the extended family.
So, when this courting thing with Cynthia continued to go forward, I was able to chat with Connie, one of her sisters and her mother. Their review on Cynthia was positive, while recognizing the agonies she had experienced in the last eight years. Another friend (who had known Cynthia for over 30 years) also gave her thoughts.
Of course, I had my own “reference” going back 30 years. I had coached a trio that Cynthia sang in. At 19, she was young, forthright and a hard worker. I have to add to that the whole beauty of her voice was attractive. Although she may have felt differently about me, I found her on the “good” side of my personal assessment scale.
As I am in the over 50 age bracket, before I got heavily into this courting thing with Cynthia, I did some checking. Back when I was a teen, the checking might have been based more on looks. This time around it was based more on character (although she has beauty about her!). She had also been warned by her sister that I was eligible – and had her own preparation that needed to be done.
To be continued . . .