Uncategorized

Today is a work  (fix the church, refurbish the building) day at our church.  Men tend to appear.

I am not one to take the lead in construction.  I will put on gloves and tote and lift.  Although I love the result of well done construction, the expertise of construction is not in my court!  

I enjoy organizing a big project.  I love to dream what things will look like and dream them into existence.  I like to bring people together to become friends and neighbours.

In the last few decades men have been told they are wild at heart.  Somewhere inside we are told we would rather be out rescuing the damsel, building homes, playing sports and conquering the world.  All with our hands and our brawn.

Not everybody agrees.  In my own travels I have seen many sensitive men who love working on computers and conquering the space of the home.  I have seen dreamers whose dreams are about the world in general and not the dirt in particular.

Work days for them are network times, times to be with others on a project that they will help finish, but which does not require them to conquer anything.  It’s just plain fun. 

So, let’s break stereotypes!  When you see a group of guys together swinging hammers and singing “yo-ho” songs, don’t look at them as just another bunch of “manly men”, sweaty and full of brawn and not much brains.  Consider that each one is their own man!

Not everyone is as blessed as I am!

I say that with all sincerity.  One of my mothers chose me.  The other two I chose!  And let no one say that when you got married, you didn’t choose your mothers-in-law.

Yes, you did!

The mother who chose me from birth is currently in the last breaths of her days.  She is the one who compassionately instructed me in God, grace and giving.  I love to find ways to serve others, because she was always a servant.

My first wife’s mother chose to live with a man who was godly – whose family background was messy but whose heart was pure.  She exhibits tenacious love for each of her children – yet with allowance for each of their giftings.  I am blessed that she has kept me in her thoughts and prayers for the many years I have known her. 

My second wife’s mother, from her earliest days chose to exhibit strength.  She was a career woman with a gifted husband, raising five unique children.  I walked into a family where my brothers and sisters include a community figure (though now dead, she still affects a wide circle), a lawyer, an accountant, a churchwoman/mother/community organizer, and a professional painter.  Those who are married brought with them a doctor, a successful business man, a retreat center organizer (besides being a marvelous cook, church secretary, and hostess) and a pastor.  She has let me be me, while not feeling shy about giving well meaning advice.

Now you know the rest of the story.  There is a reason I feel so blessed this morning as I reflect on each of my mothers.

BTW:  I am just starting to extol their virtues.  If you have a few hours, I’d be glad to sit down with you and regale you with the fortune I have found in my mothers.

The word has come that my mother is not doing well.  She has had some seizures and possible mini-strokes – and has now contracted pneumonia.  For those who have dealt with this type of situation, the prognosis for a long life is not good.

So today I have been making arrangements (I am the executor and am trying to get a step or two ahead of things). 

More than that, I have been remembering. 

The times around the kitchen early in the morning as I unloaded the dishwasher and my mother prepared lunches.  Those were chat times that were short but always worth the encouragement, or instruction or funny comments that make for shared memories.

There was the day that my mother took me out shopping (I was just finishing grade 12) and “forced” me to chose my own shirt.  I did ask her advice but she was helping me grow up.  I’m not sure I’m yet able to do a good job of coordinating clothes, but I do have something on whenever I step out the door in the morning.

More memories will come!  I’m thankful for my mom – her love for God and for her husband, and for each one of us kids!

What a great heritage.

As we head into the rest of the Easter break, my wife and I are headed out in different directions.  By the time the week is done she will have ventured four hours northeast and I will have headed four hours southeast.  Separately.  Apart. On missions.

No, not church missions!

My wife will continue her chosen profession, painting walls and beautifying a house in Prince Albert.  I will head to Gravelbourg to visit my mother who has recently had some mini-strokes in the nursing home she inhabits.

While this may seem counterintuitive during a break, for both of us this will be part of family.  My wife will take my step son, and they will work on the painting job together – and I understand some nephews and nieces may show up.  I will visit with my sister, and together we will visit my mother.

While we could selfishly spend all our time together (which is one definition of smothering another person), instead we will increase our family connections.

Who knows, maybe there will be this coming together of a huge family reunion in years to come just because we are willing to be apart.